my 4 favorite boys ever!  / Hija (godmother//cousin)
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so close  / Hija (godmother/cousin)

hi ducky! i just wanted to let you know what an awesome job u have done watching over mommy & keiran!! u are already a great brother =] keep mommy as strong as she is being. always remember you are NEVER replaceable, ill never forget u, or ever stop loving you, thinking of u, speaking of u, wondering what my life would be like with you here! you know how much hija loves & misses u, if i could explain it people would think im nuts because ur only my cousin..well to them you are, to me you are everything! My baby cousin, my godson, my little brother, my best friend! i miss u soo much casey!! well hija is going to finish cleaning her room, its hard to just fall asleep bc im so anixous!

fly high my ducky! xoxo LOVE YOU FOREVERRR!!

 

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pic of me b4 prom  / Hija

Hey baby, doesnt red look so good on hija? i miss u cutie!

 

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my ducky forever!!  / Carissa Aka Hija (cousin//godmother)

Hey my little ducky!
 you only have about 2 more weeks til ur a big brother! im filled with excitment but yet scared...i know that you will be here with our family to help us all get through this. i will never forget about you..and u are NEVER replaceable. i need you to be there with me (im sure we all do) when we see Keiran for the first time. to be honest im not really sure how im going to react, i probably wouldnt know weather to be happy or sad. i'waited 9 months for u & got nothing & it isnt fair..i wanted you more than anything!! i would give anything if we could just have you back forever, i would give anything to hear your cry, see you smile..anything! i wanted to be able to look out at the crowd day of graduation & see u smiling and clapping away..i wanted to be able to take pictures with you day of prom..and as these days approach i want it even more!!!

i love & miss u will all my heart!!!

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To a special Angel Casey  / Helena Card (Mum of Hannah Card )
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yoo casey  / Carissa Aka Hija (cousin// godmother )
something is wrong w/ ur page. ive been tryin to light candles and its sayin my code is wrong..mommy has been tryin all day!
  If this works i just wanted to say thanks for the rain i didnt have to run the mile in gym =) lol love n miss u sooo much xoxox Close

your room  / Mommy

Hey Casey

Daddy thought it was time to start getting your room ready now that Keiran will be here soon.  It breaks my heart that we have to change the color and everything.  It's hard knowing you never even got to see what Daddy had done for you.  I am going to leave your light switch in there for Keiran,  and I will put the stool Aunt Christina bought for you that had sailboats and your name on it under the crib.   Hija is going to take the mirror that matched the stool for her room.  Keiran is always going to know all about his big brother Casey, how brave you were to give your life for us.  I really believe if you didn't who knows what could have happened.  I love you with ALL my heart.  I am so proud to say I will have 4 boys and people look at me like I am CRAZY.  They just don't know how special one of them is.   You are my heart and soul, my EVERYTHING!

 

love

Mommy

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made these especially 4 u  / Carissa Aka Hija (cousin/godmother)

 

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casey bear  / Carissa Aka Hija (cousin/godmother)

hey ducky..just sitting here thinking of you like always! now that its been really getting nice out i always think to myself..i could have taken casey to the park or for a walk..things would have been different. but now that it is getting closer for Keiran to come i just want to let you know that i will always be thinking of you..when u see me holding him smiling dont think i have forgotten about u bc ill be smiling bc ill be thinkin of you when i look at keiran. i know you will take good care of both mommy & ur lil brother..you will always be in my heart as well as my thoughts..have sweet dreams my favorite angel. miss you sooo muchh!! xoxox 

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love you  / Mommy
I just wanted to THANK YOU for watching over me and Keiran.  Without you by my side I couldn't have gotten this far.  I know deep down in my heart you gave your life so your brothers would always have a Mommy.  You always knew something was wrong and we tried to tell them but they didn't listen until it was too late.  I am forever grateful to you for giving me the rest of my life.  I know everything with Keiran is because of you.  Finding out I have Thromobophilia, the timing of me getting pregnant with Keiran, all my appoinments going so well and everytime I get a new picture of your brother I can see you.  I know you are a BIG part of him so when he finally comes I will have both of my boys all in one.  I love you Casey James with every piece of my very broken heart! Close

ducky / Carissa Aka Hija (cousin/godmother)

Hey ducky.
 its been a little over 16 months since you were taken away from us. i still find it very hard to believe. we were all preparing for you & next i know i was preparing to come home early from our vacation because our little casey was now an angel. i wish just once that mommy would be calling me saying " do you think you can come over and watch casey while we take the boys to football" now we just call each other to say " go outside & get ur casey kisses" or " i just saw a butterfly outside". anyways i just wanted to let you know how much i truely love & miss u! you have made such an impact on my life, you are thee best angel ever!!

 

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SENDING LOTS OF LOVE  / ROSE GRMA TO ANGEL BRITTANY SYFERT (BRITT'S ANGEL FRIEND )

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hey ducky  / Hija (cousin/godmother)
Hey casey, im just sitting here..none of this seems real..im not even sure yet if it has hit me that u arent here..i feel like its fake..im just waiting to wake up..everytime i do something w/ ky or go over ur house and see ur brothers..i always think.."i wonder what casey would be doing" and ud think that thats when it would hit me..i can keep wondering but i will never know..I MISS U CASE! i have many many flashback to the day of ur wake..i can remember exactly where everyone was sitting, what everyone was wearing...it seriously felt like a dream..i was just sittin on the couch to the right of u..just staring thinkin how could it be possible..then id look over by mom hugging gram..how strong of a women she truly is..i dont care what people say about her..yeah she may try to work outside and something would happen such as that incident with her elbow lol..and theyd joke with her..yeah she may be weak on the outside but on the inside she is soooo strong. your mom has done so much for others because of you.. well now im getting really tired and might continue to ramble on so im just going to go..i love and miss you a whole bunch!! xoxoxoox Close

Pictures / Mommy
Daddy and I were cleaning up today and we were finding pictures of your brothers from when they were little and I realized I will NEVER find old pictures of you.  I will never have to quess is this Shawn , Jayson or maybe Casey.  It just breaks my heart that all we will ever have is 2 pictures of you.  Never one of me, Daddy and you like I have of your brothers.  Just one of you as an Angel.  I love you always! Close

hi baby  / Carissa Aka Hija (cousin/godmother)

I LOVE & MISS SOOO MUCH CASEY! WISHING YOU WERE HERE WITH US EVERYDAYY!!!

 

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Thoughts / Carole Mom To Angel Heather Bates (connected by angels )
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an assignment i had to do in school..  / Carissa Aka Hija (cousin/godmother)

Hey ducky this is an assignment i had to do for english class..we had to write a letter about something we carry with us & i chose to write about your memory that i carry with me..well here it goes

 

Dear Casey,                     March 5, 2008

 i am writing you this letter to let you know i am always carrying your memory. From the day i found out your mom was pregnant with you i knew my life was going to change, only if i knew how it was going to end. Your memory if very important to me, your very important to me. i think of you all the time. Sometimes i cry because i miss you alot but i comfort myself by remembering your in a much better place.

 It just never crossed my mind that you wouldnt be here with us. there we signs that we just didnt see till it was too late. I dont think that it has really hit me that i will never get to see you. As many times as i think it has hit me it really hasnt. I have many flash backs, the day i found out i was going to be a godmother, the day i found out you were a boy, then it gets worse, I flash back to the day of the wake. i have nightmares all the time. you just never think that you could in that 5% chance but when it happens, you realize that anything can happen.

 I remember coming to school telling all my friends i was going to be a godmother. Christmas break rolled around, i was going away to Florida and i told my friends, "One week after i get back im going to have a new cousin." i would talk about you like you were my baby. then i remember December 26, 2006 calling Britney telling her you might arrive early and she would have to go take pictures if you for me. then the next day i called her screaming you were no longer alive. i couldnt even go back to school, i didnt want to face anyone, i didnt want to hear they were sorry because it really doesnt help. their surreys were not going to bring you back.

 i carry my most favorite memory close to my heart, the first and only time i felt you kick. if i only knew it was going to be the last time i would ever feel you alive i would have never took my hand off mommy's stomach. No one makes me carry your memory, its like everything i look at reminds me of youm how badly my arms ache to hold you.

 i will never let your memory slip away. i might get stressed, upset or mad when i think of how you arent here and it feels like im carrying the world on my shoulders but i would never put your memory down. The hopes and dreams i had for you, for us, are now shattered forever! i will never get the chance to hold you, rock you or even get the chance to loook at you again, but what i can do is share your story with others and educate them how a simple blood test could save their lives as well as their unborn baby's life.

 the loss of you has made me a much stronger person. i have learned to appreciate my life and the people in it. ive also learned to live my life to the fullest because you are never promised tomorrow. Thank you for always keeping me safe and watching over me.

 i love and miss you more than anything in this world, and always will. when mommy has keiran it doesnt mean i wont stop thinking or loving you. you will always be my number one godson as well as my favorite cousin. i love you casey. i will also have all the memories of all the times it snows. i love going outside and putting my face toward the snowflakes, its like i can feel your warmth. i always look forward to the spring time because the butterflies make me happy. especially the orange ones, because i know that those ones are you. the day we found out you passed away there was an orange butterfly flying around us. we all just looked at each other and knew it was you, our angel Casey James.

                Love you forever

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Kisses for you  / Lori Mommy 2. Twins Kinsey And Kylee (mommy 2 angel twins )
Hey Casey just wanted to send you some big lovey kisses-I thought alot about you and your momma today...always on my mind sweet boy!! Keep an eye on your lil brother and momma too, Love you allI thought this was cute....Lori Close

Thinking of you  / Laurel Fanning
Just a note to say I am thinking of you and pray your family finds peace and strength in the years to come! Close

Miss you  / Mommy

I think about you every second, of every minute of every hour of every day.  I look at pictures of your brothers when they were 15 months old and try to imagine what you would be like.  They were both around 15 months when Daddy cut the back of their curls off, would you had curls too?  How many teeth would you have, what shows would have been your favorites, would you have a kiki too?  I can't believe all the things we are missing out on!  It's not fair, I know how much your brothers would have loved making you laugh.  Last night when they were all watching wrestling I am sure you would have been sitting there with them...all my boys as Hija would say my Baps Boys!

 

I hope you don't think that when Keiran comes he is going to take your place.  Nobody could ever take your place...NOT EVER.  I am so afraid when he is finally here I am going to look at him and wish it was you.  I have never wanted anything as bad as I want you back.  You have totally changed my life, I am doing things I would have never done if you were here but I would give it all back and undo it all to have you in our lives.  Everything I have been doing these last 15 months is to keep you alive.  I love you more then anything and that will never ever change...

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